Don't Take Me Seriously - Book - Page 92
ESCAPE Weekly
Does it feel like Áying?
March 12 - March 18, 2010 – 16
Like Mom said, if it feels good, don’t do it
“F
unny how fallin’ feels like pretty much comes down to the amount
flyin’ ... for a little while.” of what you do that brings you down.
That line, from the song As the most obvious example, there’s
“Fallin’ & Flyin’” in the movie “Crazy that inevitable lesson about alcohol that
Heart,” seems to resonate with a lot almost everyone learns early on, but some
of people. I know it does
repeat periodically. One
with me. And though “The
or two is flyin’ but eight or
Weary Kind,” from that
12 is definitely fallin’ — if
not that same night, then,
same movie, won the
certainly, the next day.
Oscar this year, I would
But there are other, more
propose “Fallin’ & Flyin’”
subtle
flights-to-crashes.
instead. That’s because
Consider…
I’ve done a little of both
Exercise: A bit of fit is
lately — and, true to the
Jim Walker
fine (said the lazy man) but
intro line here, what felt
like f lyin’ usually turned Don’t Take Me Seriously when you’ve added so much
muscle or lost so much fat
out to be fallin’. “I was
that your crazy-eyes bulge
goin’ where I shouldn’t
out of your leather-face from the pressure,
go, seein’ who I shouldn’t see….”
Unfortunately, quite often, what feels and your kidneys have dried up into, well,
kidney beans, it’s time to chill a bit and,
good — isn’t.
oh, have a sandwich.
And we hate that.
Movies: If you walk around dressed
Take it from your mom, the Good
Book, the police or your doctor, too like Bogart from a film noir, quote lines
much of any good thing, or sometimes from “Caddyshack” at significant turns
even a dollop of a bad thing, can bring in life (“Wanna make 14 dollars the hard
you crashing down. Whether you “love way?”), or know who directed “Santa and
a little wild one and she brings you
only sorrow” (amen Steely Dan), eat
I was goin’ where I shouldn’t go
steak fat until you heave, or veg out
on the sofa until your arteries harden,
seein’ who I shouldn’t see
eventually “What is sweet now, turns
doin’ what I shouldn’t do
so sour” (Beatles).
and bein’ who I shouldn’t be
Now, with the important things, you
usually know when flying is really falling.
a little voice told me it’s all wrong
That anxious sensation in the pit of your
stomach, the buzzing in your ears and
another voice told me it’s alright
the feeling of impending doom knock on
I used to think I was strong
your consciousness — but, sometimes,
but lately I just lost the fight
you ignore them because, well, you’re
having such a good time. “I thought I was
flying like a bird, so far above my sorrow,
funny how fallin’ feels like flyin’
but when I looked down, I was standing
for a little while …
on my knees” (Jackson Browne).
“Fallin’ & Flyin’”
Happy crash landing, bro.
from “Crazy Heart”
Now, ignoring the for-sure bad stuff,
www.youtube.com/watch?v=XFCwSd5kr_k
such as murder and pole vaulting, it
PhotoSpin
Sometimes, doing the wrong thing feels really good, as if you were nying. But you might actually be
falling. And you won’t know the diference until you smack the ground. Will the thrill be worth the pain?
the Ice Cream Bunny,” you’ve crashed in
movie land. It’s time to come back.
Television: When the highlight
seasons of your life are remembered in
terms of TV commercials, or, worse yet,
you drop famous commercial quotes into
casual conversation with people who are
too young to remember them (“Let’s
get Mikey to do it.” “Where’s the beef?”
“How do you spell relief?”) — well,
you’ve landed too hard and you might as
well just plug back into the Matrix. You
shall not be redeemed.
iPhone: If your phone never leaves
your palm, and beating your friends to
the latest “apps” is the highlight of your
week, you are falling fast. But when you
use the map-app to find the restaurant
rest room, or text your date while she’s
sitting beside you, or stop down to use
your iPhone to find the top 10 responses
in tight situations, you have crash-landed:
“Hold on Honey…Boss…Officer…I just
need to check ….”
Music: And, finally, we come to
music. It’s one of God’s sweetest gifts.
But even the flight of music can become
a fall through excessive volume (deafness,
angry neighbors, “I didn’t hear the siren,
Officer”) or repetition (“Dude, that’s the
tenth time you’ve played that song!”) or
by merely playing polka music anywhere
but at an Oktoberfest.
And, if you play music backward?
Well, that’s just letting the devil in. “Turn
me on, dead man” (Beatles).
But you know you’ve smacked the
earth so hard you’ve made a hole when
you find yourself quoting song lyrics in
your writings. And you may be beyond
help, brother.
I’m just sayin’, “If there’s such a thing
as too much fun, this must be the price
you pay.” (Fallin’ & Flyin’).
