Don't Take Me Seriously - Book - Page 267
I just don’t care
You worry about it, I’m watching clouds
S
o, I was mindlessly vegging in front of
the TV recently, hearing the rhythmic
click-click-click of the wasted minutes
of my life slipping away – and shoulderdancing to the subtle beat – because I just
don’t care. As I was doing this, some ad
came on for some smartphone, and I really
don’t care whose it was. In the ad, people
were messing with their palm-placed timesuckers and those who weren’t cool enough
to have the latest and greatest smartphones
had dirt falling out of theirs. Whatever was
the point that was supposed to be made,
I don’t care. All that occurred to me was
that I don’t need, want or care about those
phones or the “vital” things they do.
I have clouds to watch.
Let’s dig deep for a moment. When you
think about it, there are really only two
universal requirements for our being on
this planet. (1) Do no harm, and (2) Chew
with our mouths closed.
And, except for large bites of tough
steak, I have those covered.
Beyond that, everything each of us does
in life is just our own, individual version
of time-wasting. Whether you are learning
HTML, creating artistic masterpieces,
amassing fortunes, building pyramids,
becoming the Grand Poobah of handheld
technology, making dioramas with stuffed
mice or stacking road apples, it’s all of equal
merit, because it’s all dust in the wind.
Oh sure, you could go all out and say we
should not just avoid doing damage while
we are here, but actually make the world a
better place. But seriously, have you tried
that? It’s a lot of work. I will leave that to
the saints and telemarketers.
So, just for fun, let’s take a look at things I
don’t care about. You may feel similarly, and
I’m sure you could add to the list.
I don’t care about:
• Fashion (Oh, you knew that?)
• Having coffee with Apple CEO
Tim Cook (at any price)
• Traffic anywhere I’m not going
• Blu-ray
• Wine that costs more than $20 a bottle
• Europe
• “Reality” shows
• Exercise
• “Talent” shows
• Pawn shops, storage bins or people
named “Boo Boo”
• Video games
• Any dog under 50 pounds
• Any cat over 20 pounds
• The shape of my beer glass
• Anything that’s “in”
• Weather anywhere I’m not going
• 3-D
• Anything that looks small on the plate
• Doritos taco shells
• My personal carbon footprint
(I will still eat broccoli.)
• Cicada invasions
• Movie star marriages
• Better sound
• The sad state of: tech stocks, home
equity, manners, Apple, Chinese
puppet theater – or pretty much
anything that starts with
“the sad state of ….”
• Calories
• Sodium content
• Cholesterol
• Fat
• Enunciation
• Anyone who says they have
“the answer”
• Tweets
• Facebook
• Cirrhosis
• Anything related to rap
• Work
• Money
• Success
Jim Walker
• Fame
Don’t Take Me Seriously
• Retirement
• Side effects
• The future
do to Merida. Let’s all put a stop to that –
• The color pink
and then get back to watching clouds.
• Apps
And, remember, my column is tagged
• Your opinion
“Don’t Take Me Seriously.”
But, yes, I need a long vacation.
In fact, the only thing I really care about
right now, the only thing that really gets
Comment at jwalker@signalscv.com or at
under my skin, is what Disney is trying to
http://Twitter.com/DontSeriously.
Video Link of the Week:
Pumpcast News and Bon Jovi channeled
Y
http://bit.ly/17aThbJ
14 | >>
ou are probably familiar with Jay Leno’s Pumpcast News, where
an actor speaks to patrons from a gas pump television. These
segments are usually quite funny. However, in this installment,
the randomly-accosted patron is absolutely incredible as he sings
Bon Jovi’s “Livin’ on a Prayer” a cappella. And his lady is pretty
talented as well.
WWW.CONNECTSCV.COM • MAY 15 - 21, 2013
